Detox phase III: The uncut version of the story
My Detox. Unedited diary of my experiences.
Day 3 I feel so hungry!! 30 minutes after a decent meal, I feel STARVING! And I'm just giving up wheat and dairy. I made a beef stew for Pete's Sake! (Arrowroot is a lovely thickener). I feel like I'm not getting enough food and I'm worried I'm going to start getting depleted again.
I have hardly any energy to run. My legs just feel empty.
Day 5 Right, I've got my tahini to make tahini sauce. I've been having my egg, rice, greens and tahini sauce bowl for lunch and I'm feeling just fine now. I think I was in a real panic about feeling a little out of control with my food. But I did a bunch of cooking this weekend and have some good quick bean stews in the fridge to heat up and cooked chicken too. I've still been having whole milk in my red bush tea in the morning to get me going. Even downed a glass of creamy, whole milk a few times in the past few days to just keep me going. But I'm slowing down on it. I feel like my metabolism is slowing down and I'm not pooping as much. Odd, should be the other way around. But I'm working more, busy running this detox. That could be it.
Day 8 I just dumped my breakfast down the drain. It just makes me want to gag. I hate this. I don't want to eat. In my dream I was depressed! I'm depressed all day just dreading having to eat this way. I remember feeling this way on the first few days of the first week just cutting out gluten and dairy. But I don't see being able to eat this stuff. Just the smell of it makes me feel sick to my stomach. I added all sorts of good things to it this morning too. Banana, pineapple juice concentrate. yogurt, almond milk, frozen berries... whipped it for a long time and it came out really thick. Oh god, it was just MORE vile crap to drink. I feel like I'm going to cry. Really. Maybe I could just save the unopened containers and sell them at cost to someone in the group at the end who wants it.
Day 9 OK. I did it. I remember in our get together this week, Josie made one with just berries, ice and a little almond milk and it wasn't as bad as this. So I did that. Less stuff. More watery and easier to just get down. And I did it. I drank my whole lunch in under an hour with no gagging. None of the greens stuff in it, mind you. But it's a start. I feel so much better. Like, I feel totally different. I don't feel depressed anymore. God, it happened again. All that control and anxiety about my food is just CRAZY! It's like having a 3 year old trapped inside of me. At least I was able to see it for what it was this time... just a little. Wow. Talk about issues. I hope I don't have to go through this a third time on this diet.
Day 10: I feel great. I'm hungry still, but it just doesn't bother me. I don't like the smoothies, but I get them down. I'm in a good mood too. But I do look forward to my regular dinner. And I really feel grateful for it.
Day 12: My kids came into our bed this morning and my son was holding my tummy and squeezing my skin saying I wan't 'soft and squishy anymore' and saying he didn't like my detox. This was a complaint. I still feel good. I'm hungry now but I'm going to wait to eat and don't want to stop for a snack. I feel like since I haven't been able to eat what I want when I want, I haven't been able to indulge my impulses all the time. Cup of milky tea here, bit of dark chocolate, nibble of cheese. None of those things are bad, but it's the mindless compulsion and lack of control over my actions that got to me. It's much easier to brush aside those compulsions as they arise, and they drop back silently each time. Whereas earlier in the detox, they were much less silent. Feels a lot like starting a new discipline routine with a 3 year old. Initial uprising, followed by calm appreciation and respect for healthy boundaries I don't even feel like planning our post-detox meals. (But I am planning on a trip to a good bakery to have a nice little nibble.)
Day 20 Wow, the middle path is indeed the harder one. When I'm 'on a detox' I just don't consider eating sugar, bread, etc. They are not allowed. But now that Steve is off of it and I'm phasing it out, I found myself really struggling with the decision about having a sugary treat. I thought my cravings were gone, but now that I have the option, it's going to be difficult not to go back into old habits. I'm getting out my sourdough starter to wake it up tonight and bake a few loaves of sandwich bread tomorrow. We'll see what that does.
Day 21 Detox is over. I've had some bread. Fine. I had some milk. Fine. I'm not feeling that great, but I think I might be getting the flu since the kids have it. At our last meeting, I felt really inspired. Between 12 of us, we lost 40 pounds. I lost 5 pounds, and that's a lot seeing that I started at 132-ish pounds. I'm not overweight. One woman discovered that when she tried wheat, she felt terrible. Really bad. And while that's a bummer in a lot of ways, she was feeling great on the diet right away and I have an idea this is going to be the start of her feeling a whole lot better. Another one in our group has Parkinsons. I really wondered if this would be helpful to him. But it turns out he was a real 'cookie monster', as he puts it. I noticed a dramatic improvement in his speech. And that was probably the best result of all, because he is a really lovely man and it's great to hear his voice clearly. He says that he's going to keep off the chocolate. That really inspired me. Because during the whole detox, when I was feeling sorry for myself having to choke down pills and the smoothies, I would think of him with REAL trouble swallowing and just get on with it. So I think I'm off my chocolate bar addiction in solidarity.
What about this detox? Would I recommend it?
I think this particular detox from 'designs for health' is a really good system for some people, less for others. This is because I still think you can consume all the good nutrients you need to push phase II detox along in food and juices. And you can just eat simple, clean healthy meals for 3 weeks with a bit of a fast in there with great benefit. And a healthy person who has enough time and interest in preparing these foods could totally do it.
But this system does some things very well:
Ideal person: Marginal to poor health, extra money, no time, poor cooking skills. It is also wonderful for people with type 2 diabetes or insulin resistance. I think this would put someone with metabolic syndrome (pre-diabetes) solidly on the road to preventing diabetes if they carried on with avoiding sugar and altering their carbohydrate and protein intake. After you get over all those food addiction and your sweet tooth and start experiencing feeling GOOD, it's much easier to start making changes.
Would I do it again?
Maybe. I fall into the category of a person with the time and interest in preparing foods. But it was nice to have a break from it all. I still have some of the smoothie powder left and I actually think I"ll use it when I'm out on the road seeing clients over lunch so it saves me time and keeps my energy up. I can't believe I'm saying that after all that complaining.
Do YOU want to do it?
Some friends have mentioned they might want to do this. You have to buy this product through a practitioner with an account with them. If I get my act together, I might put their link on my website so you can buy it through me and run a group over email/phone. I'd like to find a way to get the price down a bit first, so I'm going to talk to them about that. Let me know if you want to and if there is interest, I'll get into gear and make it happen. Otherwise, we'll just wait until next year.
My website is www.realfood-matters.net if you want to look out for it. Otherwise, there are other great ways to detox that are simple. We can talk about that too. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this little journey. I did... not that it's over. Enjoy the rest of spring! KK
Week 1
Day 2 Just when I got my head around doing this detox and feeling positive about it, I'm hitting bottom. I haven't had time to cook or do a good shop and don't have anything to eat for lunch that I like. So I'm just skipping it. I feel kind of depressed not being able to eat.Day 3 I feel so hungry!! 30 minutes after a decent meal, I feel STARVING! And I'm just giving up wheat and dairy. I made a beef stew for Pete's Sake! (Arrowroot is a lovely thickener). I feel like I'm not getting enough food and I'm worried I'm going to start getting depleted again.
I have hardly any energy to run. My legs just feel empty.
Day 5 Right, I've got my tahini to make tahini sauce. I've been having my egg, rice, greens and tahini sauce bowl for lunch and I'm feeling just fine now. I think I was in a real panic about feeling a little out of control with my food. But I did a bunch of cooking this weekend and have some good quick bean stews in the fridge to heat up and cooked chicken too. I've still been having whole milk in my red bush tea in the morning to get me going. Even downed a glass of creamy, whole milk a few times in the past few days to just keep me going. But I'm slowing down on it. I feel like my metabolism is slowing down and I'm not pooping as much. Odd, should be the other way around. But I'm working more, busy running this detox. That could be it.
Week 2
Day 7 Wow, just when I was leveling off, THIS. The meal replacement smoothies taste vile. It took me 3 hours to choke down my breakfast and I couldn't even face my lunch until 1pm when I was weak with a headache. I had my last little glass around 4, but I still didn't finish it. Other people say they don't mind it. Steve managed to drink them w/o so much fanfare. But I've got a headache... the kind I get when I drink wheat grass (more vile swill) juice. And I feel scattered. But I made a nice dinner. Nothing special. But it was heavenly to just eat real food, rather than 5 pills and a smoothie from a boxed powder. I know these are supposed to be very high-quality supplements, but I seriously question how powdered food from a box could be healthier than the food we eat. I wish I had a feeding tube.Day 8 I just dumped my breakfast down the drain. It just makes me want to gag. I hate this. I don't want to eat. In my dream I was depressed! I'm depressed all day just dreading having to eat this way. I remember feeling this way on the first few days of the first week just cutting out gluten and dairy. But I don't see being able to eat this stuff. Just the smell of it makes me feel sick to my stomach. I added all sorts of good things to it this morning too. Banana, pineapple juice concentrate. yogurt, almond milk, frozen berries... whipped it for a long time and it came out really thick. Oh god, it was just MORE vile crap to drink. I feel like I'm going to cry. Really. Maybe I could just save the unopened containers and sell them at cost to someone in the group at the end who wants it.
Day 9 OK. I did it. I remember in our get together this week, Josie made one with just berries, ice and a little almond milk and it wasn't as bad as this. So I did that. Less stuff. More watery and easier to just get down. And I did it. I drank my whole lunch in under an hour with no gagging. None of the greens stuff in it, mind you. But it's a start. I feel so much better. Like, I feel totally different. I don't feel depressed anymore. God, it happened again. All that control and anxiety about my food is just CRAZY! It's like having a 3 year old trapped inside of me. At least I was able to see it for what it was this time... just a little. Wow. Talk about issues. I hope I don't have to go through this a third time on this diet.
Day 10: I feel great. I'm hungry still, but it just doesn't bother me. I don't like the smoothies, but I get them down. I'm in a good mood too. But I do look forward to my regular dinner. And I really feel grateful for it.
Day 12: My kids came into our bed this morning and my son was holding my tummy and squeezing my skin saying I wan't 'soft and squishy anymore' and saying he didn't like my detox. This was a complaint. I still feel good. I'm hungry now but I'm going to wait to eat and don't want to stop for a snack. I feel like since I haven't been able to eat what I want when I want, I haven't been able to indulge my impulses all the time. Cup of milky tea here, bit of dark chocolate, nibble of cheese. None of those things are bad, but it's the mindless compulsion and lack of control over my actions that got to me. It's much easier to brush aside those compulsions as they arise, and they drop back silently each time. Whereas earlier in the detox, they were much less silent. Feels a lot like starting a new discipline routine with a 3 year old. Initial uprising, followed by calm appreciation and respect for healthy boundaries I don't even feel like planning our post-detox meals. (But I am planning on a trip to a good bakery to have a nice little nibble.)
Week 3
Day 16: I feel great still. I'm bored with these smoothies thought. We're up to 2 scoops of this cleanse and it really makes it harder to get it all down, but it's just for a few days on the 3-week detox. You know, I don't have any mid-day reductions in energy. I do NOT need caffeine at all. I can totally go without sugar without another thought. I ate cold fried-rice as a snack today and it tasted WONDERFUL. I really appreciate food. And I'm not starving and shaking ever. This is 15 grams of protein and very few carbs and very little fat. I've always felt I needed that fat to help with satiety so I wouldn't binge eat. It helped me so much years ago when that was a problem. And adjusting to not having that really happy full feeling from fat and carbs was very, very emotional. But I just feel great. I'm trying to decide what to do when I'm done. I think I won't buy chocolate to have as a treat. I will keep trying to avoid snacking and will continue to keep 15 grams of protein at meals, lots of vegies and keep my carbohydrate intake modest with a low gluten. I'll go back to keeping a wider variety of grains in our diets. As for milk, I need to think about that.Day 20 Wow, the middle path is indeed the harder one. When I'm 'on a detox' I just don't consider eating sugar, bread, etc. They are not allowed. But now that Steve is off of it and I'm phasing it out, I found myself really struggling with the decision about having a sugary treat. I thought my cravings were gone, but now that I have the option, it's going to be difficult not to go back into old habits. I'm getting out my sourdough starter to wake it up tonight and bake a few loaves of sandwich bread tomorrow. We'll see what that does.
Day 21 Detox is over. I've had some bread. Fine. I had some milk. Fine. I'm not feeling that great, but I think I might be getting the flu since the kids have it. At our last meeting, I felt really inspired. Between 12 of us, we lost 40 pounds. I lost 5 pounds, and that's a lot seeing that I started at 132-ish pounds. I'm not overweight. One woman discovered that when she tried wheat, she felt terrible. Really bad. And while that's a bummer in a lot of ways, she was feeling great on the diet right away and I have an idea this is going to be the start of her feeling a whole lot better. Another one in our group has Parkinsons. I really wondered if this would be helpful to him. But it turns out he was a real 'cookie monster', as he puts it. I noticed a dramatic improvement in his speech. And that was probably the best result of all, because he is a really lovely man and it's great to hear his voice clearly. He says that he's going to keep off the chocolate. That really inspired me. Because during the whole detox, when I was feeling sorry for myself having to choke down pills and the smoothies, I would think of him with REAL trouble swallowing and just get on with it. So I think I'm off my chocolate bar addiction in solidarity.
Parting thoughts
It's hard to say just yet the final results because as I sit her typing 4 days after it's said and done, I have the flu. I haven't eaten much of anything since finishing our detox except for some ibuprofen to get me out of bed to take care of sick kids. But I learned a few things about myself. (And no, the detox didn't get me sick, it was the kids.)- I had a lot of little comfort food rituals. None of them were particularly unhealthy, but it feels good to be free of their control. Now I can take them or leave them with ease.
- It feels good to be more comfortable with the EMPTY feeling again. Because I went through a spell after having children of being very depleted, the empty feeling meant I was going to bottom out. I learned to not fear that feeling and just trust I'm going to be OK until I can eat again. I think the reduction in carbohydrates and increase in protein also stabilized my blood sugar. So that kept me from bottoming out too.
- That classic issue of attachment and aversion... there is no greater minefield for me than food. It's why I cook. It gives me control. If necessary, I can live on tasteless substance that will just get me through. It also made me appreciate the flavors of simple, real food even more.
- Most important to me was coming face-to-face with that demon inside me. That 3 year old that starts to panic when I feel out of control. I blame, I rage, I cry, I run... twice I saw it come up and abate. I feel like this demon is more familiar now. Not as scary. I know how to recognize her and that I have the strength to wait her out until she goes away. This feels like a big deal to me.
What about this detox? Would I recommend it?
I think this particular detox from 'designs for health' is a really good system for some people, less for others. This is because I still think you can consume all the good nutrients you need to push phase II detox along in food and juices. And you can just eat simple, clean healthy meals for 3 weeks with a bit of a fast in there with great benefit. And a healthy person who has enough time and interest in preparing these foods could totally do it.
But this system does some things very well:
- It gives you a set of clear, balance guidelines to follow
- The system of the smoothies makes it a very gentle detox. If your health is rather compromised or you are quite overweight, or have many demands on your time and energy, it's nice to be able to get through the detox without a major healing crisis that you can get on a juice fast. Those can put you in bed for days sometimes. The product is formulated to push phase II enzymes strongly, and that really helps reduce those side effects. The 15 grams of protein keeps you full enough that it's sustainable.
- If you have a bit of extra money and not the time, this system is great.
- The smoothies keep you choices limited. When all you have to eat is the darn smoothie, you just give up and drink it. You don't have to figure out what to make and how to make it taste better. I think living in that black-and-white world can help give us some willpower.
Ideal person: Marginal to poor health, extra money, no time, poor cooking skills. It is also wonderful for people with type 2 diabetes or insulin resistance. I think this would put someone with metabolic syndrome (pre-diabetes) solidly on the road to preventing diabetes if they carried on with avoiding sugar and altering their carbohydrate and protein intake. After you get over all those food addiction and your sweet tooth and start experiencing feeling GOOD, it's much easier to start making changes.
Would I do it again?
Maybe. I fall into the category of a person with the time and interest in preparing foods. But it was nice to have a break from it all. I still have some of the smoothie powder left and I actually think I"ll use it when I'm out on the road seeing clients over lunch so it saves me time and keeps my energy up. I can't believe I'm saying that after all that complaining.
Do YOU want to do it?
Some friends have mentioned they might want to do this. You have to buy this product through a practitioner with an account with them. If I get my act together, I might put their link on my website so you can buy it through me and run a group over email/phone. I'd like to find a way to get the price down a bit first, so I'm going to talk to them about that. Let me know if you want to and if there is interest, I'll get into gear and make it happen. Otherwise, we'll just wait until next year.
My website is www.realfood-matters.net if you want to look out for it. Otherwise, there are other great ways to detox that are simple. We can talk about that too. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this little journey. I did... not that it's over. Enjoy the rest of spring! KK
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